these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i want to swaddle you in tequila
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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