she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
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