what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize