tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
