Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
A+ Viking dick
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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