Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
