Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
