The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize