I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
