the condom got lost in my hair
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
jump out the window naked night went bad
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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