Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
