Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize