uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Non-Jews are for practice
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize