I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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