can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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