Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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