if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
