I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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