who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
