Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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