Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
