I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
