ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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