yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
