Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize