I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
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