I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Buhtt sex?
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
