How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
