So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize