i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
