She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
