just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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