i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I have feelings that need drinking.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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