Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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