Welp...herpes.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
