Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Randomize
