that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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