its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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