Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize
