So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
