Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(713): View more from Texas

I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima

(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I wanted to see November 5, 1985

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(207): View more from Maine

it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.

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(409): View more from Texas

The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.

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(512): View more from Texas

just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go

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