YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
