So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
