Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
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