final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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