I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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