Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Randomize
