We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
jump out the window naked night went bad
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
