i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Randomize
