Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
