Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
