I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I'm passing your future prison.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
