Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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